cracked teeth

she smiled like you this morning
beautiful brown-eyed wonder child
of a one-sided love


and the creasing of her cheeks,
bright eyes turned whatever color yours were,
re-opened the knife wound


like masking tape
like Velcro
like its never really healed
in the first place

and, so
this scab seeps memories of a decade before
i thought i buried the soot with your old valentine's day card
next to the rotting chocolates and flesh punctured latex
never to return and pick over their remains

but here they are

raggedy toy of emotions sprawled every shade of pink
and black
reminding me there was joy and then death

so I left
them like soldiers lost at war

With all the stories and bruises and nightmares to hide

in the sand of the desert
in the swamp of the forest
in the valley of the mountain

it is days like this
that haunt me with that scary flick
...inevitability
she smiles like you,

and the pain of a broken vessel
is renewed
the steel walls are more steel gray than the tumtulous
...eye
look at her
and
wish
you nightmares

it is your absentee handiwork that forms tears upon silent phone rings
and messages never received
it is the emails unanswered and birthday wishes
of daddy's angel, blown out like
candles

I left a dollar under her pillow, the other day
Almost forgetting the fairy tale ritual, for my arms
Were tired of fighting a mere memory
This is when I pretend not to pick up the armor around
This stone heart,

when she throws her voice to your picture; waiting
for your approval to catch her
you lie, still
faded & torn, with open palms
Polaroid shell of a ghost father
Smiling an uneven grin
Shooting her dreams like a hunter
with perfect aim and
cracked teeth

this is when her last baby tooth falls;
unhinged,
mimicing the depth of your hollow,
I will pray it is the last time she
reminds me
of you