Wednesday, June 08, 2005

re-affirm...life lessons III

...keep your enemies closer --

i can't say that has worked well for me. i don't have it in me to front for the sake of it. sitting in someone's face like i really dig them -- it ain't in me to lie to myself! lol even though its one of those 48 laws of power. i have tried to separate friends from business. that makes it easier to deal... like my man says "you don't have to like everyone you work with."

i think my experience has proven the fable about the mouse, lion and bird are closer. "those that shyt aren't necessarily your friends & those that help you out of the shyt aren't necessarily your friends".



action speak louder than words--

this is definitely true. i can't knock it and i have to remind myself to pay attention to what is happening, rather than what someone says. words are pretty and ugly and necessary - but action is the entire reflection of their soul. tormented or not.



treat ever day as if its your last --

word up! i realized, i start going haywire if i sit in the house *now that i'm off of bed rest!* and just watch tv. my body was built for moving mountains. 'sides, i want to teach amari that nothing is given to you. nothing except grief. you have to work for your happiness - but you also should enjoy the hard work. i don't believe in just working and working and never looking around me. this world is too gorgeous for that crap. take in the scene. i promise you - it's worth it.



working hard, loving hard, playing hard...

i can't help it. i still do these things. i mean what i say. and if i don't mean what i say (i.e., FUK YOU) then i will soon enough. i act in haste, but the emotions are pure. i work like any single mother. i have nothing from amari's father. only thing i can thank him are her eyes. she is definitely the best little girl on the earth.

yesterday i told her, AMARI means "lovely immortal girl" in hebrew and "god is highest" in swahilli.

she asked why i named her that and "what does immortal mean?"

i told her "it means living forever."

she said "i can't live forever, mommy."

i said "i know. but the good you do on this earth will last forever. look at malcom x. look at martin luther king. ida b wells. rosa parks. do you understand?"

she said, "yes."

and replied "thanks mom. thanks for thinkin' i'm immortal. i think you will help alot of people too."


i hope so 'mari... i hope so

2 comments:

CousinSarah said...

Mo-
Wow. As a mom, those moments seem like the best reward. I just want to say to always remember that she is a reflection of you...that she understands is among your successes. Being a parent is the hardest thing in the world and I always hope I get more right than wrong. I always try to revel in THOSE moments. When my son (he's 4) comes in from where he is playing without provocation and says "I just wanted to tell you I love you mom," and then returns to playing as if it was something that he just needed to get off his chest. I try to remember that I have done something right, in all the things I may do wrong as a parent, I have taught him to feel the overwhelming sense of love that makes you go into the next room just to tell someone. That he is free in that. That he will have that as a foundation in the times that people may try to rob him of his joy.

Seems that you have an amazing daughter and sometimes we as mothers dont hear enough what a good job you do...especially when you dont have the other parent around. So I just wanted you to hear today, that you are doing an amazing job.
Sarah

Mahogany L. Browne said...

thank you sarah... im smiled so hard i started to cry