before you assume

anything more than this is just another blog. don't.
this is a happy medium. i've had few days where life
just
is.

i like it.
not expecting the worse.
though i have been missing my child
immensely.
i call her constantly
and worry just as much.

i feel silly most times
then sometimes - i feel like
how could i not worry.
after working at a group home
and for the many non-profits that
protect and provide for children
that have been abandoned, molested,
and beaten -- i am always extra sensitive.

as if that's even possible.
but it seems it is.

now i sit in coffee shops
wondering if she misses me
like i miss her
wondering if all this shyt i've
involved myself in
is worth losing out summer time
with her -- then i remember
nyc is cool -- but a kid needs
an alternative

and i love cali for that.
it is home of the bike riding banchees
that are my neice and nephews.
where they smell grass and dirt and pollen
instead of JUST car smoke, asphalt
and tar.

hmph. i dont know where i was going
but i know where i wasn't -- and that's
to the drama filled portion that is my
poetry life. lol

to even separate it like that and give it
a title is hilarious in itself.
but, when things go awry and folks find themselves
losing themselves to the same egos they
condemened...then its time for separation of
church and state.

here's to prayers