so sad insomnia

i cant sleep
dont know how explain this feeling of hopelessness

its funny when you see the monsters behind the shadows come to life.
not "ha ha" funny. but funny like, aww damn. not you too silhoutte of a protective shield. i thought you were different.

and then you remember the old school saying: BIRDS OF A FEATHER...

right. so i guess we keep it moving. pretend like nothing happened.

and syllable crazy has moved dates. thursday is the new date. but i can't lie
like i ain't disappointed in cats. all that community shyt we pop -- then how
many of us show up to a free event...? exactly.

so it's back to the capitalist in all of us. support your bank account. stop pretending this art is fed on human contact alone. biters. go away. my back is missing pieces of flesh.

but the amazing thing is: i'm preparing for my 1 year anniversary at the nuyorican next friday.
its a beautiful and scary thing, ya know??

most of my favorite poets will be in the house spitting something insane to remind me that there is something to doing this poetry thing. hope to see your smile there (feb 29, 2008 @ 10pm). the line is unfortunate. so don't be stuck outside listening to how much fun we're having inside...

on a real painful note. i gotta say this.
ma: my heart breaks for so many people these days.
just splits in half heaving in puddles
you are worth everything that matters.
i dont think i can say that enough.