new writing, getting lost and North Carolina for 300, Alex

i made it to NC. after 2 hours of traffic in New York and New Jersey, then another hour of traffic in Virginia. i pull over. decide to sleep for 3 hours or so, and make my way back. instead i wake in 2 hours and 40 minutes. ask billy errol why the hot chocolate machine isnt working, use the restroom and make my way *the wrong way* to charlotte.

on my way to miami, it hits me. i missed my turn somewhere! ugh

after my 12 hour driving trip turned into 15 hours, i made it into my brother's rocky driveway.
my newphew ran to greet me and amari at the car and so did my mother. i wasn't so mad anymore.

just tired
no room for that. headed to walmart with maDUKE to get last trimmings for thanksgiving dinner and end of buying my newly single brother, a kitchen set. crap!

where's the coffee?
right here. in my hand. a cup of grande skim white mocha settles my 2 hour shopping experience gone awry mood and im back to getting back. as soon as i get in, i crash in burn on the couch and wait for the spinning room to stop along with the voices. 2 hours later. i dress and head to my brother's surrogate family for thanksgiving dinner.

thanks-killing
what a time of year. to be reminded how christopher columbus sucked all types of ass when killing native americans. so how do i say more gravy to that? i don't, necessarily. my daughter knows the truth. but i also understand, this is the time my family gets together. the one time i tried to boycott thanksgiving, i broke my grandmother's heart. as she was into the gathering of her kin. and so it stands. i am rocking the dinnerware for fam. we have conversations that i know wouldnt happen, simply because life can be that raw. and when you have one - you rarely see those that loved you while you worked around the edges to a smooth new you. do i make a toast? show my thanks to the day? no. i show my thanks to the blood coarsing thru my family name. i appreciate them for all making time that day, and hope they will know from the hug, that i wish it were everyday, we were able to hold each other, like this.