MY BIGGEST FEAR
not doing enough. not accomplishing enough. having all the tools to make it happen - but running out of steam in the process.
i think thats why i run myself into the ground. why i wake early and stay late. why my personal life will always suffer -- too much work to do, too little time!
i think i should look into getting hypnotized. something extreme and alternative. something that will make it all make sense. it seems like i got this thing down packed, right? life is crazy demanding and hard and easy and wierd and im just trying to leave a legacy. leave something for amari that wasnt left for me. not even a silver spoon - but some fight. some drive. maybe just a spoon that wont break or tarnish. that will be waiting to show her and my grandkids the way.